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Hair Training

When Ted was 10 months old Michael’s National Guard unit had JRTC, so he was away for a month. It was the first time he was gone longer than a weekend since Ted was born & I was teaching full time (with an hour commute). Needless to say, I didn’t have a lot of extra time on my hands. I was looking for any way to cut back on time consumers as much as possible. One of the big time ‘wasters’ was how long it took to wash, dry, & style my hair.

2 months after starting, my hair was so healthy!

In my search to find ways to minimize the time I spent on my hair, I found Jasmine Rae Hair Co & her hair training method. When I started I was going 2-3 days, 4 if it was a weekend, between hair washes. Jasmine teaches the science behind scalp stimulation, oil distribution, and hair types.

For me, that meant using dry shampoo in my bedtime routine (so that it could really soak in overnight), using a boar bristle brush to move oils down the hair shaft, and adding a day between washes every week. For example, if you are washing every day, do every other day for a week. If you was every other day, do every 3 days, and so on. This gives your scalp time to realize that it doesn’t need to produce as much oil, since you’re not stripping it every day.

2.5 years later, and over a year between trims.

The longest I’ve ever gone was 16 days (April 2020 was a wild time!), but I usually wash once a week. I can push to 10 days if I have an event or something (or if mom life is overwhelming). This has allowed my hair to grow more quickly, healthier, and be easier to maintain. Other things that I’ve done to help this process are: use a silk pillowcase, use a scalp massager in the shower, and invest in high quality hair products. I don’t feel as bad spending $$ on expensive shampoo if I’m only using it once a week.

I am continuously working to simplify our life, so we can spend more time doing the things we love. This is especially important when I’m solo parenting, and time is a luxury. I love finding ways to make life easier, and sharing them with you!

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Decluttering with Kids

Minimalism is a trend that has been in and out of popularity recently. I love the book The Cozy Minimalist by Myquillyn Smith; it is all about how to merge minimalism (the art of having enough) and hygge (the Danish culture of coziness). Minimalism and kids seems laughable; kids come with so much stuff! But a lot of the things that we ‘need’ for our kids, are not actually needed. A few open ended toys that are age appropriate are all that they need to set their imaginations on fire. We are making sure to have some toys that are specific interest to our kiddos right now, but they could vary depending on what their interests are.

This is extra relevant to us, as we prepare to move across the country with only what we can fit in our SUV and that is all we will have for 6-8 weeks, until our furniture and things arrive in the moving truck. We plan on bringing a dozen or so books, and a dozen or so toys for them to use until August. (See list at the end of this post for more details). To prepare ourselves for the move, the boys and I have been slowly but surely going through our things (clothes, books, toys, household goods) and deciding what is worth waiting two months for. Everything else is either going in the trash (non-reusable) or taken for donation. I think we have made 3 trips to Goodwill this week.

Fewer toys mean deeper, more meaningful play with the toys that they have.

Teddy (4, next month) is right on the cusp of understanding what it means to donate our things. I have included him in helping me to pack up the boxes of my things to take. Modeling is the best teacher after all! He isn’t quite ready to donate his own things yet, so that I have taken the lead on. It has been mostly books that they do not read or aren’t developmentally appropriate (a lot of 3rd/4th grade books from my teaching days), or toys that they have outgrown.

Jr (2, next month) has no idea what is going on, so I make a point to narrate what we are doing when we put the boxes in the car and drop them off at the donation center. Hearing the words associated with the action, and describing why we do it will help him to build an understanding of the joys of giving. This is something that we also do as a family around Christmastime.

My challenge to you is to find that balance of ‘enough’. Not so much that you’re overwhelmed by things, and mess, and constantly picking up. Not so little that your life feels empty and devoid of love. Just enough.

My boys will play with dinosaurs for hours.

Toys we are bringing with us

  • Magnetic tiles – Both boys love building with these! We have a combination of different brands of these, and they are all wonderful. The Picasso tiles came with a booklet of ideas for building that has inspired Ted a lot!
  • Dinosaur figures – Both boys are currently obsessed with dinosaurs. The figures are by far one of their most used toys.
  • Foam blocks – These foam building blocks are some of my favorites because they are soft and quiet when my little Godzillas decide to destroy Tokyo.
  • Monster trucks – They love playing with these indoors and out.
  • Lovevery kit – Jr got his most recent Lovevery box last week, and all of the toys in it are interesting for both boys. They use the animal figurines in their Dino/monster truck play. They like making different designs with the pegboard. Jr loves practicing his buckling skills with the buckle pillow.
  • Play tunnel – This collapsable tunnel doesn’t take up much space (great for our move) and provides a wonderful opportunity for gross motor and sensory play, when I know that our furniture will be limited.
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Home Systems that Help You be a Better Mom

Having spent the better part of the last year & a half as the only adult in the house, I can tell you that it takes about 4.2 seconds for two kids under 4 to destroy everything. While there are some tasks that they can help with (cleaning up the playroom, for example) there are some things that have to be done, or at least facilitated, by the adults. It can easily become overwhelming to juggle all of the daily, weekly, and monthly tasks to keep a house running.

My friend Terena created a Home Systems Planner to keep everything organized. Her planner includes everything from cleaning schedules, routines, meal prep, and beyond. I use the goals sheets, routine sheets, and yearly cleaning sheet to keep myself organized and on top of our daily needs. The biggest hurdles (for me) are keeping up with dishes and laundry. With only me & the boys it doesn’t feel like we have enough to do a whole load every single day, so I end up putting it off, which leads to having it piled up. Oops. So with Terena’s goals sheets I have made it my goal to run & put away a load of each every single day. Some days that means that the dishwasher will run a half a load, which feels wasteful and annoying, but it means that our house is staying in shape and manageable. So I’ll take it.

Another system that makes our lives a million times easier is decluttering. When you have less stuff, it is easier to pick it all up. I know Marie Kondo was all the rage (do people still say that?) a couple of years ago & I still live by many of her principles. Whenever I fold & put away laundry, I ask myself ‘Do I love this? Do I feel good in this?’ If the answer isn’t a resounding ‘Yes!’, it goes in the donate box. The same goes for the boys’ clothes.

When it comes to books & toys I start with ‘Is this broken?’ If not, how often do they play with it? Sometimes it’s a matter of switching it out in our toy rotation, but other times it’s something that they have outgrown, or have multiples of. We talk about our donations, what they are, who they are going to, and why we donate the things we are no longer using. As they get older, and this becomes more familiar, they are going to help be a part of the decision and donate process. Specifically around birthdays and holidays, when we know an influx of new things is coming, it will be important to make room for those things.